Some of you know this some of you don't but I -like many others unfortunately- have been a victim of dating/domestic violence from the ages of 15-17. It was never physically abusive but if I had stayed in the relationship it would've become physical. For me the abuse I suffered was verbal, emotional/mental, I was with someone who was completely different when we first started dating - nice, caring, a little wacky but someone who I enjoyed spending my time with.
After the first year of being together however...things started to change. He CHOSE to become homeless and CHOSE to become involved in drugs. I also noticed that he had underlying mental disorders, well I kinda knew about them beforehand but, they were deeper than I suspected. I had wanted to break up with him for quite sometime but was afraid to do so- first off because of what he could do to me, friends would choose sides (which they did) and what I was most afraid of was what he would do to himself. I finally broke up with him shortly before my senior year of high school and it took its toll on me because I had lost people who I THOUGHT were my friends and lost contact with those who really were my friends because of him and because I decided to stay with him. The year after breaking up was the toughest, I became reclusive, gained a large amount of weight and became depressed. Lately I've been looking back - not dwelling- because a few of my friends now are involved in the same kind of relationship I had. I know what its like to have someone try to control you and hold stuff over your head and make things that aren't your fault SEEM like your fault because they can't look in the mirror themselves and don't want to deal with their own issues and want to play the victim. At the age we are now (most of us are in are mid to late twenties) we shouldn't have to deal with this and it needs to stop. If you feel trapped in a relationship GET OUT NOW, if its abusive- either it be verbally, physically, emotionally and even sexually GET OUT NOW! You have a support system that will help you get through the tough parts. NO ONE deserves to be treated like that. If you feel trapped and don't know how to end it TALK TO US! That's what friends are for after all!
I hope all of you who see this are appreciative and not defensive.
